Where did I go? What happened? I've slowly been gaining weight since my first year of uni, 16 years ago! Back then I was an unhealthy (for me) 55kg. I am almost double that weight now. That really scares me. Double! Two of me! That is definitely unhealthy. I've been kidding myself telling myself that I'm just overweight. I look ok. But I'm not - I'm OBESE, almost morbidly so. I never want to get back to 55kg, but what I do want is to get ME back! I used to be so carefree and so able to get out there and talk to people I didnt know. I had CONFIDENCE. I want that back.
I don't want to be the mum at a playgroup that's too shy to talk to people. That's just not in my personality. But it is who I have become. I don't like it. I don't like ME.
I love my life. I have a husband who loves me for me and is encouraging and supportive. He's not a super-social being so doesn't really understand my need to put myself out there. But he does see my shyness. He's not really sure where that's come from. I am a mum to two beautiful kids (2.5 and 1). They light up my life and they're really very cute! I'm lucky enough to be able to stay at home with them while my poor husband slaves (?) away at work.
So I'm on a journey. A very selfish journey: to find Marnie - the vibrant, carefree Marnie.
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